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The Problem With Trying to Be Understood

Trying so hard to get people to understand you can derail you from your purpose.

Good day sunshine!

I hope this message finds you feeling exuberant! (Now there’s a word I rarely use. :))

After listening to last week’s podcast, a dear member of The Hive reached out concerned about my health. She wondered why I was being so mysterious, mentioning all the “stuff” I was dealing with.

I apologized for causing her to worry and expressed appreciation for her caring and concern - and for calling me out.

It seems I’ve been a hypocrite.

I stress the importance being open, honest, and vulnerable and yet I’ve been hiding, afraid to share what’s been going on.

That ends now. I “bee”lieve I express myself better in the podcast, so I hope you’ll have a listen.

The gist is that I’ve had a hard time emotionally this summer. I know. Woe is me. <wink>

I gave up something I loved so much (my life in NYC) temporarily to focus on someone/something I knew deep down I needed to love more – myself and The Queen Bee NYC.

There was a lot of noise in NYC that I became sensitive to and wasn’t able to tune out.

I have a big vision for how I want to change the world and felt I needed to give myself more space to create. And that’s what I’m doing. We’ll see how it all plays out.

And while I realize that I made the choice, believing it’s the right thing for me now, that doesn’t mean it’s been easy.

I’ve lived in NYC for over 17 years. It’s a huge part of me. Hell, it is me – I call myself The Queen Bee NYC for crying out loud!

NYC is where I feel I belong, and yet I got this strong feeling (I get those from time to time.) that it was time to leave.

As I’ve come to learn over time, it’s best to follow my intuition. It’s never failed me, even though I can’t see what’s happening when it’s happening. That’s where faith comes in, I guess. :)

A wise friend once told me that it’s a luxury to be understood. She watched me struggle to get people to get me. I wasn’t winning and it was causing so much unnecessary frustration.

I wasted precious time and energy worrying about everyone around me that I was being distracted from my purpose. And I found myself doing it again recently.

This is not unusual. Because we care, right? We want to feel connected to people and we do that by sharing common ground.

The problem happens when we don’t feel bonded and get caught up trying to change others to think or feel the same way we do.

This is futile. If you find yourself doing it, give it up! The only way people change is if they want to.

The best thing you can do is to be an example to others. They are not your responsibility. You’re only responsible for yourself.

In the podcast I’m talking more about following your heart, giving yourself permission to be yourself, and having faith despite what everyone else around you thinks and feels.

It was a little scary to open up and be vulnerable, but I went there and hope it helps.

And if you think this message would uplift someone you know in a similar situation, by all means, share it! I’d “bee” ever so grateful!

Thanks for all your positive support and love. Here’s to unapologetically being and having faith in ourselves.

Until next time…

Bee Buzzing,
Amy, The Queen Bee NYC

© 2015 The Queen Bee NYC All Rights Reserved

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