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What The Bangles Taught Me About Clarity

You've got to know what you want in order to get it.

In 1986 I had yet to meet my fashionable friend who would have told me that less was more. :)

I used to be a pop star.  In my imagination of course.  Susanna Hoff from The Bangles was my go-to.  I’d dress up, strap on my guitar (read: tennis racket rigged with thick fluorescent shoelaces as a strap and a quarter for a pick) and sing and dance in front of my mirror.

I forgot about my self-imposed childhood stardom until one day when I woke up singing “If She Knew What She Wants” by The Bangles (why?!) and suddenly saw myself back in Yardley, Pennsylvania, on Albright Drive, upstairs in my room “performing” that song!  Memories…

Anyway, I had no idea what that song was about back then, but it finally hit me: CLARITY!

The girl they were singing about didn’t know what she wanted.  And if she knew what she wanted, he’d be givin’ it to her.  Givin’ it to her…  (Anyone else laughing like a teenage boy - or Michael Scott?!)

Anyway it makes so much sense, right?  You have to know what you want in order to get it. If not, you’re pretty much aimless.

So many people I talk to – myself included - get stuck in a place of confusion because they’ve lost touch with what they want. (And they also don’t realize that what they want can and will change.)

You don’t get clarity from sitting around thinking (or stressing) waiting for it to arrive. You have to take action and do something.

BUT, if you don’t know what to do, you can wind up exhausting yourself running in different directions if haven’t received some guidance first.

Ever get lost and refuse to ask for directions? Or consult Google Maps?

It’s as if we have something against the easy route. Our ego has this need to prove that we can figure it out on our own, so we try all these different ways until we either get there (and it took much longer than it had to) or we get frustrated enough to get help.

When it comes to our own direction, the guide is inside already. So why are we not taking advantage of it?? (If that question was an orange, that would be the juiciest damn orange. Going deeper on that in today’s podcast.)

Here’s the deal. If we’re always go-go-going, the noise from the outside world can start to drown out the sound of our own voice, making it all too easy to get distracted and confused. Shutting out the world — for even a few short minutes — does wonders to reconnect us to our desires.

So, if you feel like you have no idea what you want and are in search for some clarity, just chill out!  Note: This is totally counter intuitive for people hard-wired to control (like me!) but it works.  So DO IT!  ;)

Seriously, you’ll be amazed at how quickly you can center yourself and get back on the “right” track when you get grounded and quiet!  

Remember what Lao Tzu said, “Muddy water, let stand, becomes clear.” I like that visual.

Have you tried to get quiet and “listen” for guidance? What are some of your challenges doing that? I’d love to know so I can help.

Here’s to being still and guided to clarity. And to The Bangles. May this song take you back and rev you up.

Bee Buzzing,

Amy, The Queen Bee NYC

© 2015 The Queen Bee NYC All Rights Reserved

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